Two years exactly! How about something internet- and gaming-related?

Those that play the popular MMO World of Warcraft are abuzz with excitement now that FigurePrints has announced it will be making custom figurines of in-game characters. For a price, of course. Still, the technology to churn out customized figures on a massive scale is an untapped market waiting to separate gamer geeks from their disposable income.

One of the cool things about the internet is that while it contains lots of hi-tech and leading-edge stuff, it also serves as a repository of all sorts of historical information. For example: In June 1957 a time capsule was buried in Tulsa, Oklahoma, to be opened in 2007. But this was an unusual time capsule, since it was a brand-new Plymouth Belvedere.

Game-related news roundup.

• Sales of the Xbox 360 in Japan, in contrast to the rabid sold-out US, are "lackluster".


• Long-time fans of the popular MMO Star Wars Galaxies are upset at major changes to gameplay and are reportedly leaving in droves.


• Talking on a cellphone and driving (big surprise) don't mix because of the multi-tasking issues. But a study on the matter provides an interesting revelation: "I have to say that the best ones are those who play a lot of video games," [Professor Lien] pointed out. "Those are lab studies, however, and not driving tests."

Now get your game on. Because the alternative is exercise.

Geeks don't like hardware unless it has beautiful girls draped over it. Or is it geeks don't like beautiful girls unless they are holding awesome hardware? Who are we kidding, they like both independent of each other; the two are just better when they're together. It's Swedish hardware pr0n.

Wow, it's been a while. But it seems like the intarweb kept going without us. No matter.

So, being the geek I am, I thought I'd see if I could find a web page with a merrily blazing log to throw up on the monitor. Open IE, start typing into the address field. Christmasfire.com? Strike one. Fireplace.com? Strike two. Yulelog.com? Bingo... whoa wtf?

It seems that there is software out there, that you can own, which lets you catalog your Hallmark collectible ornaments. I defecate you naught. Check out yulelog.com for yourself.

As we all know, the Lord of the Rings is a pretty darned good trilogy. It makes for an excellent set of movies and tons of trivia questions with which you can prove your Geek skillz. But, what if LotR was written by someone other than Tolkien? Perhaps someone like Douglas Adams or Ray Bradbury? Well, here is your chance to find out...

I personally love this Douglas Adams version. I'm still reading the rest!

It's no secret that most geeks like Star Wars. Most debate the movies, many have costumes based on characters, some even mod their computer.

But one has turned his Honda into an "H-wing".

I noticed a disturbing pattern about those "first thing in the morning" conversations at the office. When you're a gamer geek, they always seem to start out, "I was playing <game name> last night, and was on this server..."

Is it just me?

Are you a gamer? Have you ever been to Ikea? If you answered yes to both of these questions, then you'll get a hearty laugh from the Ikea Walkthrough guide.

When I read this, the following played out.

Scene: Office cubicle farm.
Me: <laughing hysterically>
Co-worker 1 through 5: <pops up like a prairie-dog in their cubicle, looks quizzically in my direction, comes over to my cubicle>
Me: <more laughing>
Co-worker 1-5: What's so funny?
Me: <points at screen>
Co-worker 1-5: I don't get it...
Me: <wiping tears from eyes> Never mind, it's a <wheeze, deep breath> gamer thing. Whew!
Co-worker 1-5: <backs away slowly, keeping eye contact> Uh, yeah...
Me: OMG that is teh funnay!!1

I think that test is fixed. Lookie what I got.

What Famous Leader Are You?

And, just for the record, my hair looks WAY better than that.

Do you miss the old arcade games? Ever wanted to build an arcade cabinet to run a MAME emulator and impress your friends? Perhaps this will fit the bill.

As a geek, one way to impress your geek friends is to have the fastest processor or the coolest video cards. For the hard core, it's all about storage. Now you can buy a 1 terabyte storage system for your PC, which every geek needs for your video and MP3... er, I mean properly licensed and paid for digital content, which may include entertainment brought to you by your friends at RIAA or MPAA.

Ahem.

Anyway, it's all about size - right?

For Ye Olde Geeks, you may fondly remember the time when a terabyte of storage looked like this. It's a IBM Photostore "massive storage system" from 1969 installed at the Lawrence Livermore National Labratory. You can find out more information about it here (scroll down a few paragrahs to the IBM Photodigital Store section.)

It used to be that playing video games could get you in trouble. But now just asking about them will.

"Bowling for Columbine" - The Condensed version

I laughed so much, I nearly woke up the baby. Heh.

Courtesy of dowingba.com via Dean's World.

I was in Fry's Electronics tonight, checking out equipment for my new computer setup. During my browsing, I needed to use the men's room. While I was standing there, I heard little electronic noises coming from one of the stalls. I thought, "Good Lord, someone's playing a game while they're doing their business. Now that's a gamer!" The noises continued, as I shook my head in disbelief. Finally, the unseen occupant sighed noisily and said, "Oh Jesus. Hello? No Jackie, I'm wiping my ass. Yes, I'll be out in a minute!"

It wasn't a game; it was his phone ring tone. Man, that dude is on a short leash.

As I left, I saw his girlfriend waiting outside the men's room, phone in hand, obviously impatient. I walked by and casually said, "He's wiping his ass. He'll be out in a minute." The shade of red she turned was totally worth it.

Remember: when snowballs are outlawed, only outlaws will have snowballs! (Okay, so I stole the line - but it was a great line!)

So you need a vacation, and leave for a trip to Los Angeles. While you are away your friends decide to play a practical joke on you involving over 4,000 square feet of aluminum foil. But the question is: does it block the alien mind control beams?

So I bought a new computer last night, online of course. It should arrive sometime next week. It's been a long time; now I can finally max all the graphics settings in my games! (And dude! It's got striped RAID drives!) But it's hard to buy a system with a plain ole case any more. Either you buy a mass merchandise pre-modded box (from CompUSA, for example), or you do it yourself, or get a ready-made mod box from any number of vendors like this one.

Speaking of sexy gamers, you know you're a total gamer dork when you react to real life in gamer terms. I found a dead mouse in the garage today, that had fallen into one of my recycle bins and couldn't get back out. I immediately thought of Gauntlet and said, "Gray mouse needs food!" Then, mad that a rodent had invaded my territory, triumphantly pointed at it and screamed, "HA! 0wned!"

The 2003 Sexiest Gamer Awards. The name says it all.